LIES!

My daughter had a book she got for Christmas from a relative. This book is called “Songs to Go.” It is a book that is nothing but random pictures and the lyrics to the songs that are included on a portable music player. Here are some terrible pictures to help demonstrate what I mean:

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Notice Donald actually puts pants ON to go swimming.

Notice Donald actually puts pants ON to go swimming.

Who needs an iPod?

Who needs an iPod?

She loves this thing. Both the book and the music player. I keep saying I will never buy her Kidz Bop (which I until now had been calling “Kid Bops”), but here she is listening to the same lady sing the same twenty 30 second songs over and over and over again, like a reverse siren.

One of these songs is The More We Get Together:

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This is nothing but extrovert propaganda. Horrible.

Your friends are my friends and vice versa? And they’re all in the same room? And I have to get to know them all at once? No.

I’ve written some shy introvert versions of this song in case you’re in need of one like me:

The more we have our own time
our own time our own time
the more we have our own time
the happier we’ll be
and I’ll have my own space
and you’ll have your own space
the more we have our own time
the happier we’ll be

or

I’ll see you all on Facebook
on Facebook on Facebook
I’ll see you all on Facebook
and I’ll like your posts
Then you can like my posts and
say “aw” to my photos
I’ll see you all on Facebook
and I’ll like your posts

or

I’m better one on o-one
on o-one on o-one
I’m better one on o-one
‘less you’re that way too
then an talkative buffer
can help conversation
I’m better one on o-one
‘less you’re that way too

or

Please don’t try and call me
don’t call me don’t call me
Oh Please don’t try and call me
please text me instead
then I can think a-head
bout what I am saying
oh please don’t try and call me
please text me instead

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Which version of the song speaks to you or is there another version that works best for you?

P.S. When I say Lydia loves this thing, I’m not kidding. That music player has been a life saver on many occasions so I hate to bite the hand that feeds me but I did anyway.

6 thoughts on “LIES!

  1. Those song lyrics are brilliant. I’m obviously an introvert. And do NOT call me unless someone is dying.

    I may need to get that thing. My 6 mo. old is already obsessed with Mickey. And even more strangely….Toodles. It’s one of the only things that will distract him long enough for me to get rice cereal in his face.

  2. I’m kind of in the middle (even my coworkers have commented on how I can be an extrovert and an introvert at the same time) but I remember that song from camp so I tend to like it. I dig your versions too, though.

    And DO NOT succumb to the siren call of KidzBop. It will make you depressed while realizing how inappropriate songs are on the radio. For reals, if you have to edit the words to put them on a kids album, maybe they (oh, I don’t know) don’t belong on a kids album? But maybe I’m just crazy.

    One of my favorite examples? Bruno Mars Lazy Song:
    Original lyric-Meet a really nice girl/Have some really nice sex/And she’s going to scream out, ‘This is great, oh my God, this is great.

    Kidz Bop lyric- Meet a really nice girl, send a really nice text. And she’s gonna write back, You’re so great OMG you’re so great!

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